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From: mike
Date: Thu Mar 31 12:05:31 MST 2005 Subject: looking for feedback

Responses
Karen: Not sure how to approach this one (3/31/05)
clrclady: Social Work and the PAST (3/31/05)
Boojeee: dug up stuff (4/1/05)
mike: thanks (4/1/05)
emily: No Subject (4/1/05)
Karen: Habakkuk (4/1/05)
mike: thanks (4/2/05)
ryan: you asked for it... (4/3/05)
mike: No Subject (4/4/05)
Responses (sorted by date)
mike: No Subject (4/4/05)
ryan: you asked for it... (4/3/05)
mike: thanks (4/2/05)
Karen: Habakkuk (4/1/05)
emily: No Subject (4/1/05)
mike: thanks (4/1/05)
Boojeee: dug up stuff (4/1/05)
clrclady: Social Work and the PAST (3/31/05)
Karen: Not sure how to approach this one (3/31/05)
I am having a tough time coping with my child abuse intervention class. Triggering everything in sight.
This morning I got a tour of the newsroom at the Star as part of my journalism 101 class. I am not sure I can handel social work, at least the area I want to go into. I am thinking of changing my major to journalism. Thoughts?

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From: Karen
Date: Thu Mar 31 14:37:52 MST 2005 Subject: Not sure how to approach this one

Would you be willing to outline the process by which you ended up in school for social work? (I don't know any details, just the general background, and I'm sure many others here know about as much.) What were your motivations, your expectations/understandings? How has any of that changed? Did you expect to be able to detach yourself emotionally from the work, or at least set some safe boundaries for yourself, and now you're finding that it's hard to? (Hey, welcome to community service ;-) )

You know, no one's particularly adequate for the behemoth task of child abuse intervention, hence the crazy burnout trend. But are you convinced--or do you at least have a tentative faith--in this being God's calling for you, right now?

I can't tell from the tone of your post, what kind of feedback you're after. Is there anything that can/should be done so that you can stay on this current social work path? If not, why do you want to go to another one? Is it truth about yourself & God's direction for you now (which sometimes does seem to spin on a dime, I have to grant that), or is it fear that is pulling you? Mr. Intimidation himself/itself? If you can effectively rule out Mr. Intimidation first, then we can talk about journalism.

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From: clrclady
Date: Thu Mar 31 15:21:59 MST 2005 Subject: Social Work and the PAST

This is not the first time that I have heard you doubt this calling. I call it a calling because that is what it appeared to be when you entered the field to pursue social work and to go into CPS social work. It will bring up a lot of junk. It will stir a lot of emotions and a lot of pain. You will grow a lot through that stirring. I agree with Karen and you really need to take a look to see if intimidation is at your tail. This is not a decision to make lightly and it should not be a decision to be made out of fear. Remember your calling. Why did you choice to go this direction? What has God uniquely gifted you with to help others? Because of your past, you are able to relate to care and to protect children in ways that other people are not able to do. Coming from the field and with a dreaded past myself, it is not an easy route. It is a very painful and difficult journey, but it is very worthwhile to be in the trenches with God by your side. He tends to and sooths your hearts in ways that are unimaginable as you feel His suffering for the millions of children who unfortunately need to be protected by someone because of their parents. If you change paths, do not do it out of fear. You know I offered an ear to you before. Anytime, you would like to chat through this, call me.

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From: Boojeee
Date: Thu Mar 31 17:10:07 MST 2005 Subject: dug up stuff

I agree with karen and cheryl. I also think you should be talking to people about what's getting dug up. We love you, Mike, and you're not in this alone.

thought the pics would help set your eyes on things above.

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From: mike
Date: Fri Apr 1 12:34:50 MST 2005 Subject: thanks

Thank's all of you for the responses. I know I doing what I am supposed to be doing. I just do not want the pain involved. I suppose I thought I could detatch from it. I was just whining. Thank you for the pics Julie. I needed that.

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From: emily
Date: Fri Apr 1 13:35:05 MST 2005 Subject:

I just thought I'd add a bit of "whining" that got published....well, by God I guess.

Habakkuk 1:2-4 (regarding the condition of his society)

How long, O Lord, must I call for help,
but you do not listen?
Or cry out to you, "Violence!"
but you do not save?
Why do you make me look at injustice?
Why do you tolerate wrong?
Destruction and violence are before me;
there is strife and conflict abounds.
Therefore the law is paralysed,
and justice never prevails.
The wicked hem in the righteous,
so that justice is perverted.

(AND LATER ON IN VERSE 13...)

Your eyes are too pure to look on evil;
you cannot tolerate wrong.
Why then do you tolerate the treacherous?
Why are you silent when the wicked swallow up
those more righteous than themselves?

(APPARENTLY GOD THINKS THESE ARE IMPORTANT THINGS TO THINK ABOUT....)

EmilyM

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From: Karen
Date: Fri Apr 1 15:26:21 MST 2005 Subject: Habakkuk

Yeah, preach on, sista.

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From: mike
Date: Sat Apr 2 10:00:24 MST 2005 Subject: thanks

I am back on an even keel. Thank you village women. I find it intresting non of the men responded to this. Hmmmm..

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From: ryan
Date: Sun Apr 3 14:16:15 MST 2005 Subject: you asked for it...

Hi Mike,

I spent six and a half years getting my undergraduate degree. Unlike most of my fellow students who were taking the long road through college, I enjoyed my classes and did really well in almost all of them. I just couldn't make up my mind what I wanted to do. I started as an art major, got frustrated and discouraged and switched to classics, got discouraged and switched to architecture, got discouraged and switched to management information systems. I finally graduated with that degree, which helped only slightly to get me my current job as a technical writer. I actually attribute a childhood passion for writing rulebooks for role-playing games to my employment, but that's neither here nor there.

I've spent the last few years at the Village rediscovering myself as a creative being. If you look at my list of interests before the degree I finished, all of them have a lot to do with creativity: art, art history, and architectural design. Information systems? Well, I guess everything is `creative' but it's probably not what most people would call an art. It's all about efficiency and analysis; unless you're a modernist, art is more about expression. Anyhoo, I wound up with a degree that was sorta fun, but very easy to get and very safe.

Back in college I didn't have a community that encouraged me to understand myself as I truly am. I look back on my college years and think, if I had understood myself better then, if I had been encouraged to be who God made me to be, I probably would have stuck with art or architecture.

Andrea and I went to Texas last fall to spend time with my aunt and uncle there. I never really got to know that side of my family, and found that my aunt (my dad's sister) had a career in information systems. In her retirement, she spends her time dreaming up very cool houses. She's wealthy enough that she gets to build them, too. Her husband calls her a frustrated architect. I suddenly felt such a bond with my aunt and realized I'm not adopted, after all. :-)

I don't know if my story applies to you or not, Mike, but I thought I'd share it because I felt a little bit of a connection with your struggle. I believe that what the women have offered you is of God, and I wish they had been there for me when I was contemplating my departure from architecture school, or of art school for that matter. Looking back, I think one of my reasons for choosing IS instead of art is because art or architecture was, for me, very scary. It is very close to my identity. IS is safe, it doesn't require my creativity so much. It doesn't require much of me. Now I find myself struggling because my job really doesn't require much of me, but fortunately I am in a place where I have lots of time away from work to pursue my passions. They're still scary, though, and I don't always take that time to pursue them.

I enjoy my life, though, and I see how God has used all my experiences to draw me closer to him. Even my mistakes and my sin. As I stumble along behind him, struggling along the journey, I see that life with him is truly good.

Love ya, Mike. It's been exciting to walk along the path with you. Whichever way you go on your journey, he really is there with you.

Ryan

p.s. My wife and I have been confronted lately about our sin of avoiding being who God has called us to be. I want to confess that I have been demanding of my life and of what I want it to be, and struggling with being depressed when it doesn't look the way I want it to. I have been running from our project to do an addition onto our house, because I am terrified that I will be exposed as a know-nothing, inept, wanna-be designer (all lies - thanks Andrea).

I (Andrea), despite some objections, also have something to confess. I have been avoiding artistic expression, specifically preparing my self-portrait pictures (from our art assignment months back)for display at the Muse; look for the pics on the right. I also have not been taking full advantage of the opportunities for dancing; dancing also brings me alive to my passion.

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From: mike
Date: Mon Apr 4 09:48:43 MST 2005 Subject:

Thanks for the input Ryan. I know what direction the Lord wants me to take. I just did not want to feel the pain others feel that are trapped in the sins of others or thier own sins. I do like to write, and plan on doing more of it, but not as a journalist, but as an amature.
I agree that the women in our community have a great deal to offer, and thier advice and support is important to me. Thier honesty is important also, though it is painful at times.
Thank you for sharing with me.

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