Thoughts for the day
So, it has been 7 months and 20 days since a nearly died from three blood clots in my lungs. I am off of Coumadin (blood thinner), Hurray!!! I was thinking that it has been about 7 months since I started down this path of creativity. I had been dabbling here and there in watercolor and drawing for about three years before this, but seven months ago, I started taking a drawing class which sprouted into a watercolor class, that sprouted into another watercolor class, that has now become one-on-one class time with the teacher in her home studio. Pretty crazy!!! It has been five months and 17 days since I stopped trying to hurt myself, and I have been free of demonic creatures connected to me. In this time, so much has happened; life seems to be moving at light speed ahead. It is so unbelievable. Six months ago, I was at the Seneca House with women rotating taking turns by the bed side because I was so out of it, under so much bondage, and I had cut on myself that day. I am now sitting with tears in my office as I write this. Full of amazement, full of gratitude. This community has done a lot for me and has really been there as my family. So, with that said, I will struggle through to make it another day of not smoking and of staying alive. Every once in awhile I get overwhelmed with the craving to smoke, today was that day as I have spent the majority of the day talking about a family with three children who have been severely damaged by sexual and physical abuse. Everyone is lying; there is no clear direction on where to go, and I am the one being looked to for the answer. It is in those moments that I just want to run away and hide. It is in those moments when I would have tried to deaden myself in some way six months ago. But, I have tasted life, and it is good. So, I keep walking down the road. I would just ask for prayer to continue to fight each day. |
