From: clrclady
Date: Sat Oct 16 02:47:16 EDT 2010
Subject: Process Poem

The longing to have someone to share my life with, And that person to share their life with me, To deeply, to the core know each other, To be able to impact each other and those around. Some say I am in love with a romantic ideal, But it is an ideal that I see on a daily bases. If I never knew what I good relationship was Would not life be so extremely less painful. I runaway, I hide, I busy myself to not sit and see. To not live in the pain that my surroundings Constantly reveal to me each day I refuse to even stop to let my True Lover touch this. He begs me, woos me, reminds me, But I am full of bitter jealousy and rage. The liar says I am not as valuable the way I am The dysfunctional, the odd ball, the fifth wheel His voice seems so loud and so familiar. I will busy myself, do, please, be the savor To find the value that I am lacking. It is no good; it is always no good It is not the romance that I missing, It is not the idea of having sex that I am missing It is not even the need for a relationship It is filling this void of “abnormal” that I have lived Nothing fills the void inside or stops the pain. My Lover is still wooing, still calling out So quiet and tender is His voice Often I can hardly hear it among the craziness, Only resting in His arms “alone” remains.

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