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From: MaryKay
Date: Wed Feb 20 06:30:11 EST 2008
Subject: Again?

Responses
russ: we'll pray (2/20/08)
Boojeee: praying (2/20/08)

MaryKay: Confused (2/21/08)

MaryKay: No Subject (3/1/08)

Boojeee: still praying (3/1/08)

Responses (sorted by date)
Boojeee: still praying (3/1/08)
MaryKay: No Subject (3/1/08)
MaryKay: Confused (2/21/08)
Boojeee: praying (2/20/08)
russ: we'll pray (2/20/08)

Would you please pray? Tom will be having a MRI at 11am today to investigate a lesion on his liver that showed up on his routine CT scan. He completed his chemotherapy one year ago and I confess that the thought of another round of cancer treatment is daunting. The MRI will show what this growth actually is and if it is or isn't the return of cancer. We are clinging to the hope that this is no big deal and are striving to live in the moment and not in the what ifs. Prayer carried us through in the past and we as you to lift us up in the now.

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From: russ
Date: Wed Feb 20 11:53:51 EST 2008
Subject: we'll pray

Wow, we'll be praying.

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From: Boojeee
Date: Wed Feb 20 17:52:47 EST 2008
Subject: praying

me too

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From: MaryKay
Date: Thu Feb 21 18:51:06 EST 2008
Subject: Confused

Maureen, the oncologists physicians assistant, just called to tell us that the radiologist is unsure what the lesion is on Tom's liver. They will be pulling other results from all his previous scans to do more comparing looking for clues. Here's what we do know: 1. The lesion is extremely small. 2. The lesion is not consistent with pancreatic cancer. 3. Blood test tumor marker results are not elevated.
This lesion could be anything from an injury incurred during his surgery to a new type of cancer. And so we wait to hear what the next step will be. And so we wait to know what we're dealing with. And so we wait clinging to hope.

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From: MaryKay
Date: Fri Feb 29 20:19:23 EST 2008
Subject:

Well, here’s the latest on Tom. The MRI did not give the radiologist an accurate comparison which means it did not provide the information needed for a diagnosis. What has been proven is that he has a hemorrhagic lesion on the liver which means the lesion is filled with blood and isn’t a solid mass. Unfortunately, we still don’t know if we are looking at cancer. The most likely options are to wait 3 months and do another MRI which will give the doctors a guaranteed comparison OR choose chemotherapy now just in case cancer is involved. We have an appointment with Dr. Ketchel, the oncologist, on Monday, March 3rd at 3:00pm. to gather information and explore the options more fully.
I confess I’m sitting here fighting against being consumed by panic. The thought of having to make such a huge life impacting choice seems insane. Wait and possibly give cancer time to grow and invade or pour poisons into his body that might not even be necessary. Right now I know in my head that God knows the right choice and that He is in control, but all I want to do is run away and pretend this really isn’t happening. The lie that life isn’t worth living is trying to consume me and I’m struggling to hang on to truth and trust.

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From: Boojeee
Date: Sat Mar  1 10:11:33 EST 2008
Subject: still praying

Not really anything to say. I'll keep praying for guidance and encouragement and healing.
Love,
Julie

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